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January 05 Moving !!Well, Spaces has been good to me and like a man who waits to make sure his new girlfriend is working out before he leaves his old one, I am now leaving Spaces to blog in yet another spot (I actually have been blogging somewhere else before this spot too!).
So if you come here looking to see what's up with the OG, I kindly direct you to my new place http://www.theglamchron.blogspot.com/!
Same great blogs with out a lot of the other extra stuff!! Enjoy!
Be EZ,
OG Technorati Profile December 11 Friday was a GREAT day not just a good one!!Ok Ok...I'm kinda back. Well not really but I tought I should share just in case someone decided to check on me in these here parts of the world!! I won't waste time trying to catch you up, you will find my life is much like a soap opera if you keep on watch long enough you'll figure ourt what's going on pretty quickly. I can't promise any kinda regular blog schedule here, but Imma try to post every now and again. Friday I signed a contract to build my house. I signed it, it just little old me being responsible for a house. I am so psyched. When I left my house, I gave myself 2 years to get a new one. The thing is everything about this house is what I want from the floorplan, where it will be located, and to the lot. I picked the lot with the help of a good friend. When I signed the contract, the closing date for my complete home was given to me as 2-28-07. That will be pretty much a year to the date I left my house and moved in my apartment. 3-1-05 was the day that we both use as the END of us and the beginning of the next chapter. It’s funny how cyclical life is. I hope I close on that day it will be a wonderful FULL CIRCLE MOMENT. Even if I don’t, when I move in the house I will have met my goal and I love reaching goals. Something about setting a goal and achieving it, I really love timed goals well when I reach them that is. I’m so excited because this is on my own. I mean my first house was with my ex and he reminded me very much that his parents were a big part of us getting the house and they were. They were great to us and their present allowed us to be able to get married in a big way and move into a home. Now don’t get it twisted we put money in too, its just that things would have been a lot tighter if not for them. Good people. Anyway, this time there are no gifts, no second income, nothing but me. It’s very scary in a lot of ways, but it is really exciting too. I know I’m a dork. I just want to be able to do on my own, not because I am selfish but I guess because I’m proud. I just want to be able to take care of myself and not rely on any man to save me. I think that could be a turn off to many, but that’s me and I have found out there are a few men that appreciate that drive within me! *wink*
What else has been going on in my life? Well, I had to talk to my ex recently. He told me he was getting remarried, to be honest I am surprised it took him so long. Most men who married tend to remarry, not all the time, but usually. And many times they marry within 2 years of being divorced. Anyway can I tell you guys a secret…come in a little closer…closer… I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO ECSTATIC ABOUT SOMETHING IN MY LIFE!!! I mean I think I am supposed to be the bitter ex-wife, but I’m not. I would send a gift but that’s not appropriate. Now do I still think my ex has some issue YEP, but that don’t mean he doesn’t deserve to be loved by someone unconditionally we all deserve that at least once in our lives. Anyway, I have accepted my lot in life to be the evil ex-wife, the reality that we all chose to live in is just that our reality. *lol* What else has been going on…work has been super hectic. I have been presented with opportunity and I am going to do my best to take advantage of this opportunity. A job is work but I am happy that I have a job I love doing and allows me to do and invest in things that I really want to do. Ok check this out…one my good friends sent this to me. I had to share. I love Shaq I think he has a great sense of humor and GOD KNOWS I love LeBron!! Anyway peep this and tell me Shaq’s commentary is not funny.
As the year comes to an end… This year has definitely been a growing year. I mean I have no regrets about anything that has happened or been done by me or to me. Things happen for a reason. I have learned when you pray for discernment or revelation BE READY!!! It seems every time I ask God for confirmation about things that I am not clear headed on he answers me in a big way. Anyway with the new year staring me in the face I am excited. I just started working on a new plan well 5 year plan. My plan includes starting a new business venture with friends, taking the GMAT, applying to business school and a plan to begin saving money and doing research for a dream of mine. Well I gotta go... I got dreams to chase!!
Be EZ, OG
September 11 I'm Alive ! Just living!This will be quick, because this is really a day for rememberance. I wanted to let those of you who still come by to check on me know emphatically " YES! I am alive and yes I am blogging, just not on here."
I plan to start blogging here again. Not sure how I will use this platform, but I know some people still tool around these parts of the internets to check on me! So, I will leave a few nuggets here to let you know how I'm doing from time to time (more regular than the 4 mos you had to wait for this entry)!! So look to hear MORE from me in the next week or two maybe a WHAT I DID ALL SUMMER blog...peace and hair grease!!
Be EZ,
OG
PS- Check out the latest photos in my album, most of them are from my most fabulous summer. I am sad to see it go, but really excited for the fall to come !! May 04 Like the sands of the hourglass These are my thoughts….
From the Status Bar of G-Mail So I was deleting a message from my g-mail account and I looked up and read the status message after I deleted it. It said “this conversation has been moved to the trash”. *LMAO* if you know how appropriate this is. I mean how many conversations have you had with friends, co-workers, parents, lovers, boyfriends, girlfriends, total strangers, acquaintances, etc and you KNEW if was bullshyt when you were having it, but you engaged them as if what they were saying made two licks of sense. I may nod, but sometimes the energy it takes isn't even worth it. Much easier to smile and nod. Then I do just that what g-mail says move that conversation to the TRASH!! *LMAO* That's what my favorite BLAST of all time is about: "I'm not a stupid bytch, I just play one on TV!" came from. Now, my problem is sometimes I don’t move trash conversation to the trash and well you know what happens with trash you don’t get rid of. IT STINKS TO HIGH HEAVEN!!
So where is your BS meter? I mean for the most part I am good at detecting it, however sometimes I am not so good of getting rid of it completely, you know. I kinda let it linger around til it smells like road kill on the 5th day warmed by the H-town sun(bug larvae included) !
ooooooOOOOO I think they like me, but not as much as I wanted them to! *LOL* So I am a contract worker at my job and yesterday they made me an offer. Yippee, however it was far less than what I wanted and what I make contract, but the benis are great and I love the people I work with. And I will be an officer in the bank which is cool, just means I get more vacations and bigger percentages in bonus. Granted this will be less money than I make however it is still VERY GOOD money, plus there is a pretty much guaranteed bonus that will take me to what I wanted to make salary wise Sure I wish it was not salary + bonus that would get me to my magic number, however it is nothing to sneeze at, plus I LOVE WORKING HERE!! I mean I may be able to work somewhere else, but there is no guarantee I would be as happy with my co-workers, manager, growth opportunity, and freedom. Actually I KNOW I wouldn’t be. So with that being said, I am about to leave the world of contracting/consulting and become a FTE (Full Time Employee) again. It’s been a minute since I have been but I am sure it everything will be copacetic. Did I also mention that I think the stuff I am doing will be stuff that will allow me to write my ticket anywhere in the banking industry once I do it. So I may not be able to spend money on a new pair of Jimmy Choos shoes with this salary or a new Louie, I still can afford a few pairs of Nine West and get my Louie’s from e-bay. I don’t want to be greedy; sometimes money is NOT the only determining factor in this thing you know. I am young and I still have PLENTY of time to make it to my salary gals, I am already ahead of that curve so to speak.
Well I gotta go!!
Be EZ, OG April 25 An Open LetterThis weekend...I decided to do a little soul searching and I asked myself what would I tell the next man who dared to try to love me. This is what I came up with. It was very therapuetic. Not sure if I want to love anyone, however I am learning that sometimes things don't happen when you want them to. I just like flexing my creativity in different ways...hope you like
To the man who will make me love him:
Hey, we don’t know each other yet. I mean you don’t know how much you love the nerdy little things I do. You don’t know that you like the fact that my inside voice and my outside voice only barely differ. You don’t know that you love my outspokenness and the way I have an opinion about every phucking thing in the world. You don’t know you love the way I always seem to let you be you, no matter what. You haven’t felt the comfort of my love yet. You haven’t felt the warmth of my touch and how much I care. You don’t know that you phucking hate my outspokenness and how I have an opinion on everything. You wish you knew how someone so strong, independent, and obstinate to others could make you feel like you are “Da Man” when it came to dealing with things concerning me and you. You don’t know you are the only one to see my vulnerability, tears, and fears. Or that your voice calms all those things.
You don’t know that when I look at you, you can feel my love surround you. You don’t know that you have experienced an ally so strong and a friend so great, that you wake up to check every morning and see if I am real. You don’t know that you make me crazy with desire when I think about you thinking about looking at me. You don’t know that when I look at you that all men will fail in comparison. You don’t know that when you touch me, I am ready to rock that all night.
You don’t know that my love will open up a world that we’ve never known, because it will be different because my love for you will be unconditional, many have experienced my loyalty, my kindness, and my like; but FEW have experienced my love. The only reason I am writing you before this love of ours starts is, I may get cold feet and I may get changed before I meet you. I may decide love is not worth the toll. I may decide that love is not meant for me or that love is only for those who look, act, or live a certain way.
So just in case I forget how alive loving you will be, or I let someone take my ability away, I want you to make sure that you are you. I want you to make sure you don’t change anything about yourself. I want to make sure that you don’t let them change you; because I know that if you remain who you are, there will be no way that I can do anything but love you. If you are you then there is no way that I can’t love you. It won’t matter what the world does to me or how it may make me doubt happiness and all those things people write about, if you are you- I will love you, because I have no choice.
I will have no choice to love you because when I look into your eyes I will know that you were made for me. When you touch me my heart will flutter and my soul will smile. I may put up a front at first, because many will have come to steal the love I have for you from me, but I will know. All I say is just let me be me and love me, because I will recognize you by your love, the look in your eyes, and the warmth of your embrace. . It won’t be easy loving me, but it will be very worth it.
Ok, well I have to go now, I am not sure if we have met yet. I am not sure if I will even like you when I meet you, however I am sure that if you love me just a little perhaps I might give up the armor around my heart and trust you with it, just remember I do all this heart protection because love is life changing and losing love is gut wrenching, two things that really scare me. I don’t want fear to make me miss you, but maybe it already has. If it hasn’t and you are still around, just lean in, look me in my eyes and say “Monique, just take a chance and trust me with your heart.” I can’t promise I will, but I will try to trust you with my heart and hopefully love you and that is more than I have done in a very long time.
Your love, The eternal optimist
Be Ez, OG April 19 33I woke up this morning and thanked God for this 33rd year of my life. At this moment my mortality has been slapping me in the face. My friend lost a brother this weekend, he was only 32. So I am MOST grateful that I have lived to see my 33rd birthday.
As I lay in bed my phone rang and of course it was my Mom. As always she was the first person to wish me a happy birthday. I got ready for work and headed in and found on my desk a beautiful vase of roses, from a co-worker. She and her daughter picked them out for me, I was so very surprised. Then I logged into 360 and boy all the birthday messages are flowing, if I haven’t said thank you, I will there are just a lot of wishes coming into me at this moment.
My mom just came down and gave me a card and a piece of carrot cake. The card had me all teary eyed at work. Anyway, I have been thinking a lot about my life as I approach this birthday. I mean last year on my birthday it was the beginning of a very hard period for me; I struggled in finding my single self and what that really meant. I mean I had been part of a couple for a very long time. I mean I had gotten use to companionship and the novelty of being alone and single had started to wear off and 32 is when I really worked out what I think being single looks like for me.
I mean what I realize is that being single looks different from everyone. I mean we are all human and we are all unique and different in how we handle the same situations. There really is no magic pill, book, or person who can lead us to our own happiness. Happiness begins in you, and I know I blog a lot about men and women and relationships and random crap, but the reality is no matter what rules, books, or people you decide to follow for love, success, and happiness. All of those things begin in you. You have to love you. You have to see yourself as a success. You have to be happy with you.
That is what it really boils down to, being your friend. Before I turned 32 I thought I was happy with me. And I was, on a very superficial level. What unfolded for me at 32 made me stop regroup and do a few things. I began making myself spend alone time with me. I realized that I had become comfortable just being around others when I got uncomfortable in my aloneness (not so much loneliness…but that sometimes). I had never lived by myself so I never had to really learn to be comfortable by myself. I went from home, to school (4 roommates), to single life (1 roommate), to marriage (a husband), to divorce (NO ROOMMATE). Before I was divorced I was so grateful for alone time because it never came, there was never too much of it, because I had rarely had any in my entire adult life.
Then after I left my husband I would just fill my time up being busy with men, friends, work, and life. So alone time again was welcome. Then there were several events that lead me to force myself to be alone even when I didn’t want to. Man that is how you really make yourself grow. You face you when you don’t want to be around you. I really think that has helped me so much, because now I recognize when things are me. I see when I am being an azz and even with men, I tend to look at situations with them and know when it’s me, when it’s him, and when it is a little of both. I know that I won’t just be in a relationship because I am lonely or it demonstrates relationship qualities or because there is no reason for me not to be in one.
I will only be in a relationship if I can trust him with my heart (the most important thing) and I have learned that, takes much longer than I have ever really given a man. I mean I have trusted a few men with my heart and I don’t regret it, not because some didn’t hurt my heart, but because with each I learned what I did right to trust them and what I did wrong in trusting them. I also learned to love me TOTALLY.
I began to love me when I am sitting in the dark, alone, no pretense, and no show. That is when you look at all the things about you. The reason it is so hard to love you is because you know all the bad things about you, all the horrible things you say when no one is listening and think. I learned at 32 what I thought I already was doing. I learned to LOVE me, but not just the public facing me.
See that was the difference that was the piece that was missing for so long. I loved me, but I loved the Monique that everyone else saw, you know the loud, funny, smart, Monique, the Original Glamazon Monique, the on her grind Monique, the good friend Monique. I did not love the private Monique. The insecure about her looks Monique, the struggling with her weight Monique, and the looking for validation of love Monique. The summer of 32 made me face all of that. Made me look Monique, public and private, in her face and say you know what you are not perfect and you are not good, but you are not bad either. You are you and you are beautiful in all your imperfections, because those imperfections MAKE YOU YOU. That was my REAL ah ha moment. I am so glad I had it. I mean I thought I had it before, but now I know I really got it. Even when I may forget, it does comeback.
It has been a journey to 33 and there have been some very dark times during that journey, but at the same time I wouldn’t trade one tear. I am happy to say that where I am today is a better place than I was last year and I will try my best to be better next year than I was this year. If I can’t grow, then what am I living for.? Life is about learning and living and growing.
So to all who have wished me a Happy Birthday, thank you!! Thank you and I wish you guys the same peace, love, and serenity I feel in my heart at this moment. God, 33 is going to be a very good year for me. I can feel it!
Be EZ, OG April 14 Weekend HappeningsIf you are local and live in the H (Houston , for those that are slow) and are looking for something "academic" to do, check out the following event at Rice Cinema. ARUBA (Association of Rice University Black Alumni) is co-sponsoring an event about Oscar Micheaux. Below is all the info you need. I think it would be great for the kids (you know OG love da kids!!
RICE PRESENTS LECTURE ABOUT FIRST AFRICAN AMERICAN FILMMAKER J. Ronald Green, Ohio State University professor of film and Rice alumnus, will give a lecture about the first African American filmmaker, Oscar Micheaux, followed by the screening of the filmmaker’s seminal 1925 silent film, Body and Soul, featuring Paul Robeson.
You guys have a great long weekend, if you have one. A Happy Holiday if you celebrate it (Easter, The Resurrection, or Passover <--which was yesterday) and I will see you, when I see you. OK OK ...I will probably see you on Monday. Be EZ, OG April 13 The Year of the OXLess than a week, seven days until my b-day. Wow! I have already been saying I’m 33 so I guess that won’t change. I am about to be 33, which I guess is a good age. I am going to try to make it a good age. I am going to make it the age; it is going to be the year.
Be EZ, OG March 29 Let me Re-Introduce myself,
My name HOV, H to the O-V ... Spaces, what is up? I missed you and I hope you missed me, but I have been busy with all that is life, love, and happiness!! I am cool, my life is settling nice and like settling there has been a lot of movement, a little confusion but it is all GOOD. I am LOVING life. I have love of the people around me. I have the true friendship of people I respect and love. I have the admiration of little children in the street, ok ok ok I don’t know if that one is true, but it sounded good, right? The people that I love KNOW I love them and I am there for them.
I used to move snowflakes by the O-Z/ I guess even back then you can call me/CEO of the R-O-C, Hov'! ... Work, every day I am excited about work and what we are doing. I am doing some things and when they happen, no need to thank me, because making your life easier is what I do. That’s my job and That’s how I roll!! Lean wit it, Rock wit it! It is busier than what I use to be but I do find time to live life and between getting my grind on, I have made some great work friends. It reminds me of my first real job in IT, except the people are more mature less of the young stuff. UH!! I was a baby when I worked there and so was the rest of the crew! These people are CRAZY, TALENTED, and SMART. I really think you will be reading about what my team has done in a few years. OPRAH here I come!!
Flyer/flier than a piece of paper bearin my name/ Got the hottest chick in the game wearin my chain, that's right ... Still dating, and very cool with that!! I have been seeing one person for a very long time and we are friends. There isn’t much bad I can say about him. You know he isn’t perfect, no one is, but lately I really know this dude cuts for me. I feel we are great friends and for me THAT IS MOST IMPORTANT. I have been able to work on me while we have been dating. I have been able to grow as a person. His honesty has made me face some things about me and not make some adjustments I was trying to make in me. Those adjustments would have been for the worse. I must admit to you guys I had a “friendship” shake me, almost make me change who I was as a person. You know made me become distrustful of men in general. All I have to say is thank goodness for friends who are like GIRL come on snap out of it, Monique you are being paranoid, Moni don’t do that dude like that. Girl if you let how that azzhole acted affect how you treat other men, then he wins. They were ALL right; I realized I can’t make the son pay for the sins of the father, so to say. I am happy for what I have learned the hard way. Now I still am not sure if I am ready to be someone’s gal. I am still dating and checking my options. I will never ever just enter into a relationship on accident. When I do it will be something that we talk about and enter into knowingly. I take this shyt seriously! FO’ SHO! I heard from a very old friend, he is doing REALLY well and he is getting married. I don’t know if he knows just how ECSTATIC I am for him. I knew the first time he told me about this shorty duwop and her lil’ kid that she was his one. Some may doubt the genuineness of my feelings bout this situation, because this man was one of the three men I have loved in my life. Funny thing about really loving someone, you want them to be happy no matter what. As long as he is happy doesn't matter if it was with me or not. We were friends first and foremost! I wish him and his new family nothing, but the best!! E, I was serious when I said we cool, you asked for forgiveness I gave it and I wish you the best in life and can't wait to see pics of the new family. ONE LOVE man. YOU GET A PASS!! Apparently I only give those to my friends, WHO DA PHUCK ELSE you suppose to give a pass to? Anywho!
I'm like, Che Guevara with bling on, I'm complex/ I never claimed to have wings on Ni99a I get mine - by any means on whenever there's a drought/ Get your umbrellas out because, that's when I brainstorm... I am not perfect and I am so glad I FINALLY realized I don’t have to be. You know I have finally realize some shyt is just that shyt ,and I am letting it roll STRAIGHT down hill baby. Love puts things in perspective and shows you the stupid shyt in life that is trivial. When you love someone and they are hurting all the bullshyt in life drops quickly. I want everyone to keep Mama Buschick and the whole family in their thoughts and prayers! Just send positive vibes that’s all you need to know. I LOVE those people, they are family and whateva I can do, I WILL. My love for Saulty C, White Sault, Sea Sault, Saulty Pimpin’, and Saulty B*llz has help me make sure the things that are really important have priority in life. I love you guys. I have been looking for bridesmaid dresses for the Wedding of the year (Buschick and DBH), maybe I am crazy but I AM SO EXCITED to stand up for my girl and her boy. She really is like Che with bling on!! LOL! You guys should see that bling she’s rocking !! I can’t wait to kick it wit you guys in 2-0 –SICKNESS its gone be the event of the Summer! Fo’ REAL!!
Only God can judge me, so I'm gone/ Either love me, or leave me alone ... I finally realize people can say what they want to say about me, I really am gonna let is stop getting to me. If I’m a hypocrite, then I’ll let G-O-D tell me. If Imma bytch, Imma let G-O-D tell me. I am human and I have made and will make mistakes. I am not ever gonna get it all right. Life is about self correcting yourself. As I see it, there is a path and we all get is wrong and sometimes we think we are right, but the measure is when we see we are wrong we self-correct and get back on the road to righteousness. We go, you know I was wrong let me change that up that didn’t work. THERE ARE A TON OF THINGS I didn’t do right in my life, but I am adult enough to admit that and get on a course to do what I KNOW is right. So that’s what I am doing I am not the Monique of 98, 01, 04, HELL I ain’t even the Monique of yesterday. I am gonna always be growing, so if you knew me back then and you still think I am that chick, I’m not and all I can do is hope you don’t go crazy holding on to the skin I shed several years, months, weeks, days, hours, minutes, or even seconds back. People grow and change and those who don’t… well, I don’t kick it wit people like that, so I really don't know what people who don’t grow do or how they live. Not my concern because just like me, only God can judge them. You guys take care. Kel, Theresa, Anya, Renee, and Keith I plan on being by your spots in next few days just to check up on you! I miss you I haven’t had a chance to really get my comment on like I use to, Imma be by though- WAIT ON ME! The rest of my crew you already know, if we haven’t talked we WILL I promise!
Now, back to our regular scheduled program ...
Be EZ, OG March 23 Pay it ForwardThis week is S.O.S, Send One Suit. I have been involved with the Dress For Success probably as long as I have been a real professional. I think helping someone help them self is really where it is at. Dress for Success is so special to me because I remember how expensive it is to get an interview suit and I remember a time when I couldn’t afford it, luckily for me I always had family to help. Not everyone has family. I also love Dress for Success because I know that my stuff really is being used, I really feel like I am paying it forward when I donate my suits or help in suit drives. I have seen some of the women who get the suits and it is amazing how something so simple gives them the confidence they need in the interview. So, if you have a chance check out the site, see how you can help in your city. Dress for Success.
Be EZ, OG
March 15 Hey guys!!!I had a "friend" who once told me he wasn't the ONE, but he was my John the Baptist.(You know to tell me the ONE was coming, actually that is WAAAAAAAAAAY deeper than you guys could ever know). I am beginning to think he was right. I am a waiting for the other shoe to drop girl, but we shall see.
I know this blog is more cryptic and less verbose than what I normally write, but hey I've been busy, man. All I have to say is my life is soooooooooooooooo good right now. I was thinking about how this time last year was kinda of a roller coaster for me, I am about to be 33 in a month in a few days and LET ME TELL YOU, this birthday is going to be even better than the last. I miss you guys, but work has me busy and YES I LOVE my new J. It is COMPLETELY AWESOME, I was made for it and it was made for me, this is the place I think I will grow and thrive. Char I'll be calling soon, time to take this life to the next level!
Renee, put on your dancing shoes we doing something next weekend FO' SHO'!!
Be EZ,
OG February 28 I am so glad I am over itNothing more to vent ...people will be people and all you can do is be you! Thanks for the advice Daddy.
Be EZ,
OG Damn ManDear <you know exactly who you are>,
Look its been a while now, dude. I mean over a year. You phucked up and I chose not to play any more. Get over being the victim already! I got phucked over in this thing too, but I choose to live, learn, and let love!
I am sorry Spaces someone just mentioned something to me and I just can't believe that this person still is talking about me and writing about me. And now I am writing about them? Why can't you be like most people and move on. I hear you gotta girl and I know if I was your girlfriend your need to talk about what I'm doing and who I'm doing would worry me, but hey I am not your girlfriend or your wife anymore!! Thank God. I am adult enough to admit I am human and I made some mistakes, but bitterness ain't gonna get me. No sir. I just feel sorry for you that you have to tell a twisted truth to get sympathy from the masses. Yeah, I am human and I phuck up regularly and I try to be good which is why I go to church, however putting you on blast is not what I want to do. You don't see me blogging about your business and you inability to handle it in our marriage. Ops I just did. The real problem is I decided to do what I wanted and you have labeled it as a being a follower, however if I had followed you like the ones you employ it wouldn't have been a problem. Good leaders know how to follow and when to follow. Think about that.
I am sorry I had to get on this low road but damn if I hear one more thing about the things being said about me I am going to explode. Since I doubt you ever read my blog (cause I know I only hear about yours) I am sure one of your friends will tell you I wrote this open letter. I am sure you may respond and tell people I was in altered state when I wrote it and think your corny jokes funny, like I said whatever it takes. People who put people down to feel better about themselves, well I pity those people. Me I'm not gonna put you down and call out your faults and what you did, I am just gonna wish you twice as much joy and happiness as I am having. You know you really should stop the hating, its not attractive at all, plus you have so much going on for you, you really shouldn't have to hate at all. You are a GREAT MAN and someone will be or maybe (like I said I only hear not my biz to confirm or deny whats going on in your bedroom) is now very appreciative of the things you do and who you are. Maybe one day I'll make it over there to actually read the disparaging half-truths you wrote, nah on second thought, you keep that negative energy. I have learned the hard way to let go of it and move on. No time in my world to hate just to love. I love you man and only wish the best for you, see that is what true love really is, it is about being able to hope and wish the best for someone even when they have hurt you to the core and broke your spirit. There was a time when I was bitter and I said mean and evil things out of anger about you, but never really in public or in this blog. I will continue to only say things about you that are in relation to me sorting my feelings out about our story and what went wrong with it. I mean I did say a lot of phucked up things while we were together, but so did you. I just have chosen to take the high roads in regards to the things you did to me and not try to use your mistakes in life to make you look like a bad person. I find that being positive is the best way to live life. Best wishes in all that you do, one love.
Be EZ,
OG
PS. Spaces, I am sorry for the open letter but someone just mentioned to me that my ex was still disparaging my name and I had to get it off my chest. I really feel sorry that he has that much hate in his heart, and I am partially responsible. Me I just can't manage to muster up that much bitterness and spite for anyone, not even him or the ones who hurt my feelings before and after him. Life is WAAAAAAAAAAAAY 2 short for such things! February 21 I am getting too old for this...
February 17 The Pros are COMING!! Thoughts from ThursdayAs many of you may know it is All-Star Weekend in Houston and it is Thursday and all though they have been trickling in since Monday, today the PROS are coming. Now don’t get ready to comment and say OG the playas came on Monday. No I mean the real pros, the boppers extraordinaire, the women who have been working out, pedicuring, manicuring, shopping, hairstyling, and generally glamorizing themselves to within an inch of air-brushdom. You see all women know where there are big time sporting events there are DROVES of men. Usually young upwardly mobile men who are meeting their college buddies for a weekend of what goes on in <insert city here> stays in <insert same city here> fun. The pros know this, see the problem that some people misjudge the pro, thinking she is looking to land her a star. Sure there are pros that are looking to snag some star of some discipline (acting, sporting, and music). Those pros end is money. I am more interested in the pros that target the men, yes the ones of you reading my blog, you bras with good jobs (with matching benis) and a little change to travel to these events and party in style (what did you think I thought the Jamie Foxxs, Iversons, Denzel Washingtons, and Steve McNairs of the world read my blogs?). I predict many men will unknowing meet their future wives and long term girlfriends this weekend. Of course not all pros are looking for a left hand band, but I warn you men, be aware because what you think is a weekend of non-stop fun etc can get you get turned out if you don't pay attention. In a few years I predict one of you will be toasting a friend telling the story of how those two traveled thousands a miles just to meet in Houston at All-Star, when they lived in a 10 block radius of each other. Or even worse you will be getting toasted. I know you think nah not me, not my crew; I warn you a pro will get you if she wants you. See most women know men are pretty simple, sex, food, sports, and partying in some combination. However the pro knows exactly the percentage of those things it takes to make you unassuming men let your gaurd down while she hooks you and then eventually reels you in! (LOL! I crack me up!) Let me stop, I have already probably told TOO MUCH info. These events even turn those of us who aren’t pros into miniature Bad Bytches. If you are a local Houston woman and you want a little attention from new faces with different accents, this is the weekend for you to pull out your gear, beat yo’ face and whip yo’ wig and make the heads turn. Because I guarantee NO MATTER what you think you look like when you decide to step out and party this weekend you will find at least one man who is going to appreciate your beauty and let you know it. Let the DAMNs, HEYs, and What's Yo' Names begin. Now for me, I haven’t traveled to a big event since college when I use to hit the Howard Homecoming and Bayou Classic, however when an event comes to my city I take my opportunity to live here like a visitor. LOL! I set up a schedule that is contrary to my normal routine. I am excited mostly because I love to people watch and be in the mix, well sometimes. This mix will be fun because the people will be a WHOLE different set of people than who I normally mix it up with. It should be fun and although I am NOT a PRO by any means, I do play one on TV. Yep, me and my tribe of Glamazons will be roaming the streets a few nights of this fun filled weekend. So if you see a bunch of tall big booty toting , tig ol bitty carrying, fine azz chicks, it probably won’t be us because groups of staggeringly beautiful women will be very common place this weekend, but just in case yell out OG and see if it is my tribe of Glamazons that just passed you. I am going to leave you with a funny story I heard about in relation to this weekend. There was an add on craigslist of a chick looking for a place to stay once she got here to Houston for All-Star. Her add stated she gave great head and she would be an excellent roommate for anyone who wanted to let her stay in his room. She said they wouldn’t be disappointed in her payment! See I told you the pros were coming. Reminds me of a song of my child hood “Watch out boys she’ll chew you up!!” LOL
Who’s coming down here to kick with me or lives here and is kicking it for the All-Star weekend? Let me know where you coming from, what your plans are, and what parties, festivities, etc you plan on attending while in my great city? Oh yeah let me know if you have any questions about the city, I was born and raised in this area! I’d be happy to help make sure your partying experience is OPTIMIZED! Be EZ, OG February 13 Since people talking about love...What’s up guys!! I know I’ve been very sporadic. I am trying to keep up and visit those who take time to come here. Work is very busy but very fun. It is apparent that my new manager has picked a great group of people to work in this department. I plan on being a SUPERSTAR. But that is always my plan at everything I do. Most of the time it works. Sometimes I’m just good. But I am never bad, average at best. That’s the thing about shooting for excellence, your worst still is probably better than most people's best.
So Friday was a day that should have been a day of reflection, it was a very important day in OG history. It was my wedding anniversary which has now been replaced by my divorce anniversary 11-19-05 (not that I am planning on celebrating it! I think that is a bit tacky). I forgot it was my anniversary and then I was checking e-mail here and got an outlook alert. LOL!! I mean I knew it was coming just didn’t realize the 10th would get here so fast. Anyway, that was 5 years ago. I have changed a lot in 5 years. I think for the better. I think I am happier than I have ever been in my life and I have learned a lot about people and even more about me. I have learned to be strong and not let what others say affect me so much. I have learned to spot manipulation 100 miles away. I have learned that all relationships are two way, friendship is not a one way street. I have learned to be who I am and not who I think people want me to be. Actually, I always knew that but it seemed that some people wanted to put me in this box and instead of saying HEY WHO YOU THINK I AM, IS NOT WHO I AM!, I said ok you want me to be this good girl, then I can do that. I am so glad I left that behind. When I got married five years ago I did it because I thought it was what I should do and to be honest I thought what if no one else ever asks me to marry them. My thoughts behind getting married had more to do with what I thought I should do and not about what I felt. Now don’t get it twisted, at the time I thought it was what I felt. The mind is a powerful thing. Needless to say in the last two years I have learned to get in touch with the real me, I think really finding me. I have learned that who I am is just fine. I also must admit I have mellowed out a lot. I use to be really high strung, but these days I just go with the flow. Now, I am not as laid back as most but for me to release the need to want to control things and just sit back and let life happened is a BIG thing. I have learned that I shouldn’t have to do anything to make people want to be with me or around me. So as my gal Ntozake says Put me back and let me hang out in my ownself a while!! Hope you guys are doing great. Keep it moving. One Love.
Be EZ, OG February 06 Whistle while you work!Well guys I finished my first day and I think I am going to like it. The department is growing so fast that I will be able to be a part of working out the processes that are in place. Almost all of them are new which is kind of nice, because people are looking for feed back, etc. I really like my supervisor ( the guy who hired me) today we got a new org chart and because of the massive growth I now report to a lady who manages the Business Analyst. My sup realized he had to put a leadership in place because as he continues to hire in droves his bandwidth is decreasing faster than Ana Nicole going down on a octogenarian ( I love to saying that!! Anyway I excited about the BA Manager she has 20 years in analysis so I can not wait to learn from her. My project sounds super exciting. The PM I am working with reminds me of my friend Rob (not that Rob can ever be replaced!) , that's a good thing. I am not sure if I mentioned my mom also works at the same place so we ate lunch today and she of course introduced me to all her co-workers. That was fun! I think I am going to like working in the same building with my mother. Lets see...I don't think there is anything else I missed. Well of course now I will prob be 2 busy to surf Spaces(BASTARDOS they want me to work! LOL). Once I get my grove I will figure out how what's going on. No yahoo messenger, but I am using G-Talk ( Google's version). Well, I am going to go now. I am a little tired and I need to go find out how the ATL was for my homegirls. Don't forget me Spaces, be patient because I plan to still check everyone out, probably not as quickly as before, but I'm just like Big Brother...I'm watching. Be EZ, OG I guess I'll blog about my weekend tomorrow. A few funny stories from the wedding...hope I can remember them. Day One (again)Is it groundhogs day? LOL! Anyway today is another first day of my job. I will try to check in later this week to let you guys know how it is going. Meanwhile hold it down for me.
Be EZ,
OG February 01 OG talks FootballAre you ready for some football? The Superbowl is almost upon us and let the trash talk begin. I like football I don't have the in depth knowledge of the game like I do basketball or baseball. Ask me about how the extra pass breaks down the best of zones or how the 6-4-2 double play is a very rare thing to behold but quite exciting and run stopping. LOL!! Then we can really have a talk. However my football knowledge is fundamental. 4th and long should be punted, field goal range usually is less than 50yds (thats long and short range), and 2 point conversions are for the NCAA. Hell and I knw that some of that isn't right. Anyway, I know the rules and I even can recognize a formation or two. Ok ok ok I see the shotgun formation when someone points it out to me. I even played powder puff (women's flag football) in college. Lately, I have been learning more about the finer points of the game and let me tell you this game is a lot smarter than I gave it credit for. I mean I have watched football all my life. My dad even played a little semi -pro and of course, I've dated quite a few football players in my life (from college stars to NFL practice teamers. LOL!). However, I only know about the part of football that is about the brute force and strength, I don't know about the part that is adjusting and reading your opponent. Man, when you add strategy to the game it is fascinating, kinda like watching war. It's like a a completely different game, because if talent is equal then your ability to read the opponent is the difference. You realize the good players are good either because they are so talented they don't have a tell ( such as cheating to the strong/weak side) or they recognize the tell of others players who are cheating to the strong/weak sides. I mean I know sometimes talent makes that a non-issue ( cause we all knew what MJ's tongue meant, but no one could really stop him), but it's still fun to watch. Watching football with my new knowledge has been great its like a different game. I still think that basketball is my favorite, I have played it since I was 10 or 11. To me basketball (and even baseball- long story how I started watching baseball. That's another blog) is like my native tongue, no translation necessary, while football is like Spanish, I understand what you mean but it takes me a minute to translate what is going on. I would like to take this time to thank my instructor for teaching me about making adjustments and the finer points of the game. You have completely changed the game for me. Thanks "Z"ML Steelers or Seahawks, who's taking home the Lombardi Trophy for Superbowl XL?
Be EZ, OG |
well other people's) and anyone who wants to know more about African-Americans in Film. 
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